2002-03-22 - 5:58 p.m.

You know how you think about something in the back of your head for a few days, waiting for your subconscious to figure out the answer and then let you know?

Well, I've been thinking about chain stores lately. Specifically, is there any product or service that you can't obtain from a chain?

Taxes? H&R Block

Alternative CDs? Newbury Comics

Bars? Bennigan's

Religion? The Catholic Church

Plumbing? Roto Rooter

Football? The NFL!

Market Research (!) Car-lene

Hospitals don't count 'cause they're networked. The only two things I could think of were nail care and legal services.

Every goddamn neighborhood, no matter how small, has at least one nail care salon, usually decorated in terrifying electric blue neon. And they're all self-owned.

Or so I thought. Yesterday, on my walk, I noticed that Brighton Center's nail salon was called Paris Nails. I recognized the sign�lotsa flowers and a creepy sketch of the Eiffel tower on it�as being the same as the Paris Nails in Allston! Busted...

That leaves lawyers. Nobody micro-manages lawyers!

PS--did some more thinkin'. Miniature Golf Courses! Zoos! Erotic cake stores!

God bless America! Purple mountain's magesty!