2002-11-03 - 1:24 a.m.

I think I did good today, but I've been horribly wrong before.

It sucks, being horribly wrong. Has this ever happened to you?

I'm serious--it happens to me, and at the very least, twice a month.

It doesn't matter what it's about. Ultimate fuckup or an easily cleared up misunderstanding, it doesn�t matter. It just sucks when you act like you always do all the time, and then realize only later that you were horribly wrong about whatever. I'm not even talking about anything recent that's happened to me, of course.

I just know too well what it feels like to be horribly wrong, and later on, even if nobody cares anymore that I was horribly wrong, the feeling is still there and it will never go away.

Building confidence or an ego or an outward, charismatic personality is pointless--like building a sandcastle too close to the tide. You can build it again and again, and yeah it�ll never be the same each time, but why build something that will always be destroyed nightly?

And that's part of the reason why I'm almost never Johnny Bravado.