2003-02-14 - 1:18 a.m.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeee-nough. I'm so bored with it. Get over it.

The longer yer red-headed effigy burns, the more disappointed I get. The less angry at each half-truth report, or outright lie echo, shame on you, the less angry at the smarm, the trash, the words--the more sad.

The longer this nonsense continues, the more love lost, the more respect down the ol' flusher, the more I kinda maybe realize that love isn't infinite.

The uglier love becomes.

Nail scratching, teased hair, bullshit I've been hearing, reading, for three weeks longer than appropriate. Nasty shit I didn't think capable of love.

And yes, it all gets back to me, or I can fill in the gaps you�ve knocked out �cause I know you and I�ve observed how you�ve behaved towards others over the years.

And it just makes me fucking sad.

I'm all for folks fighting battles--but nobody has any reason to wage war on me.

If you gotta bone to pick with me, pick it. Get it over with now, not slowly, not through friends, not running for class president against a pre-chosen opponent that isn�t seeking office, slaying him, earning popularity points, no. Do it while there�s still love in my heart for you.

Before it gets to the point where I don't care at all.

Have this open and honest dialogue you�ve been begging for, a surgical procedure I�ve been awaiting, that at each opportunity, is turned down like hospital bedsheets, or say or do one more thing that you know will make me upset, either way, free me from this unearned and completely undeserved limbo.

This is my mudsoaked gauntlet. This is as far down as I�ll bend down to drop it.

Give up the campaign.

Be my friend.

That�s it. That�s all I ask. With all this talk, with all this honesty spilled out here as if it were not blood, that�s all I�m asking for.