2003-12-31 - 3:54 p.m.

I just walked across the still wet wood in my living room to snag my coffee. My bare feet are dirty and left footprints on the otherwise immaculate floor. But they say it�s the imperfections that make life beautiful, and I have my coffee.

I�ve been walking past Dunkie's all this week really wanting to go in and order a medium ice just milk. But each time I�ve talked myself out of going in no John, you musn�t, if you do then you�ll start getting used to having three coffees a day, and what comes next?. I realized today that the coffee my parents gave me for Christmas, that I�ve been making first thing in the morning, is decaf. That�s why.

I haven�t been writing much, but I�ve had a very good month. Hosting my dear friend H. has been quite the experience (I don�t mean that in a negative way--I don�t want to introubulate myself), I got some bills paid down, people were thrilled with the presents I gave them, and I got some good and thoughtful stuff too. I still think Christmas is a magical time. My ma was and is a huge Christmas junkie, and I�ve never had any Christmas related tragedies, so I can still feel the love around the holidays. I�m really bummed out now that it�s over. I�m going to miss walking into Dunkie�s and hearing holiday tunes, and shopping for people, elated when I score just the right gift, and anticipation, and there�s a little magic each day, and rolling my eyes at corny holiday movies but secretly enjoying them. I�m such a dork, I know, and I can�t say enough how much I love this holiday, so I�ll stop.

Today is New Year�s Eve and tonight the Roommate and I are low-keying it up at the Abbey. Tomorrow I have a five-disc Saved by the Bell DVD box set (on loan from a friend) to look forward to, and a hangover.

If I don�t get a chance to see you (ha, ha) I hope your new year starts off on a good note and sustains.